Feelings on inadequecy

In general, I feel like a failure in more ways than one. Specifically speaking my feelings of deficiency are founded in my best friend Mary this time. The girl can blog. Lately, she has been a blogging fiend. I this part of this is because of the infamous blog battle, but I also think that it's in part that she and Christian actually do things together (nice) and when they do things together they chronicle it (even better). Matt and I do things but we always end up forgetting the camera and then we never end up with pictures. I think that I will make an effort to take more photos in the future.


Other than feeling insufficient with regards to my blogging habits, nothing particularly exciting has happened lately. I'm playing the piano for the institute choir again this year and am actually enjoying it. It's not that I didn't enjoy it last year, it's just that this year my reasons for doing it have changed. Last year, I did it because Mary asked me and I said yes, hoping that I could see her more often. When Mary and Christian got together, though, it seemed like she was there less often so I was less inclined to go. I felt like I shouldn't be there in the first place (because I wasn't single) but Mary was my pass. Being there with her made it kosher. So when she didn't come as often, it felt awkward

This year, it's because they really needed someone and I wanted to fill the need. I also had been wanting to improve my playing abilities since the horrendous failure of me being called as the ward choir pianist in the Cary 2nd ward prior to us moving. I think I'm gotten better and I enjoy the music (especially since we're working on Christmas music). Any way, I'm really liking it and I will master O Holy Night (which is the hardest song for the piano).